Tuesday, June 19, 2007

Tuesday Morning Wake-up Call


----- Original Message -----

Ok, I said I wouldn't send something every day. I lied, at least today. But this one isn't about us, not completely.

I think Karen or I have mentioned her friend Sherry in California who also is going through treatment for breast cancer. They met each other on the Breast Cancer dot org chat room the first day each of them signed on. At the time, there was no one else signed on, so they clung to each other for a bit trying to sort out what they each were going through. Sherry has had a much tougher road than Karen. She started this alone, divorced, no family close by. She carries a gene that makes her prone to breast cancer. She had a mastectomy, which took a long time to heal. She started chemo six weeks ago. From the first treatment, she had a rough time with it.

When this first started and I was sending out updates and creative pieces, she and I started exchanging e-mails. For quite a while, she was one of two people I heard from nearly every day, the other being my aunt outside Boston. For me, the two of them were my lifelines, my anchors. Sherry was there for Karen, checking on her, celebrating with her as she made it through each stage.

We hadn't heard from Sherry in several days, not unusual with chemo hitting her quite hard. She was scheduled for her next chemo tomorrow, so I had marked in my calendar to write her and let her know we were thinking about her. When I got to my computer this morning, I found Karen had forwarded a message from Sherry.

As it turns out, Sherry has been in the hospital for the past 6 days. Her blood counts crashed and she got an infection. Her first night in ICU the doctors didn't think she would survive. She is still in isolation at home. She only has the energy to sit at the computer for a short bit each day.

If I have seemed like a militant germaphobe since this started, this is why. I'm not saying Sherry did anything wrong. I don't think she did. I'm not saying we did anything particularly right. We probably just got lucky. I knew all I was doing was shaving a few points off the percentages, hoping that it mattered, hoping people would understand. Not that it would change what I did, being The Enforcer.

But it's not about me.

Last week Sherry had news that her daughter needed a biopsy. Her daughter's husband is re-deploying to Iraq in the coming weeks, his second tour I think, perhaps his third. Even in the middle of chemo, Sherry was strongly considering going to Oregon to be with her daughter for a while. That is the type of person she is. In her note, Sherry told Karen that her daughter was since diagnosed with stage-3 breast cancer, stage 4 if there is any metastasis. She has a very large tumor. Sherry's daughter is 28.

Sherry's daughter and her husband are coming down from Oregon for a few days before she starts her own chemo to shrink the tumor before surgery. Sherry's daughter had always wanted to go skydiving. Even in her current condition, Sherry arranged for that to happen while they were down.

We haven't known Sherry very long, but from what we've learned she is a wonderful, giving person with a huge, compassionate heart. From what she's shared with us, she had a rough start to this life. If ever there was a person who did not deserve this, she is one. Not that anyone does. I wish we could do something for her.

This morning my heart cracked open and is slowly leaking onto the floor.

----- End Original Message -----

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